Fun at work! (Tanka)

TABLET+-+WIN_20131208_134950

Fun at Work (Tanka)

such festive staging
greets me; I smiled and entered
joy fills my spirit.
work will be fun today
youths will truly hear my smile.

© Cheryl-Lynn Roberts, December 8, 2013

I had been away four days from work. Sundays are not always easy to come to work when family and friends are off, but today was such a beautiful sunny day, it made the drive so much easier. The bow wrapped on this gorgeous day was walking through the door at the counselling centre to see Christmas decorations already set up. This sure helps to digest Sunday working for sure. Merci mes collègues…I do think Julie P. may have had a hand at this…hmmm:)

Sunday drive in Brossard Dec 8, 2013
Sunday drive in Brossard, Qc.
Dec 8, 2013

Photo credits: Cheryl-Lynn Roberts

Inventory completed

me oct 23 2012November and December are often inventory months for many businesses. Retail stores are usually end of December and probably why Boxing Day is useful for any commerce. For many December 31st is also a time to take stalk of the past year and what you have done or not done.

This week was my Spring Cleaning or Inventory of posts on Stigma Hurts Everyone and transferring some back to Cher Shares. I had pondered for months on placing all my posts under Stigma but somehow it just felt…I don’t know…not right (guess I have to keep practicing writing since I seem to have difficulty find the right word to express myself sometimes.)

So for readers who have followed me on both blogs, I apologize for the repetition of posts you have read before and being notified that there was a “new post”…sorry for the inconvenience. And for followers of Cher Shares, well, I’m happy to have put my writing up to date.

It would have been much quicker if my computer were not so slow. I tell ya since my laptop came back from summer camp…I mean, servicing…it took them one month, by the way, and not one week. They changed the hard drive so you would think with an almost brand new computer, it would function better. No sireeee, it is slow, slow, slow. Maybe it is on it’s last legs. Maybe the hard drive replacement is like when we get older and have a knee or hip replaclement…it does finally have an expiration date. (sigh) So just in case, I have equipped myself with a Surface 2 Tablet …my second child…{goofy smile}

Cheryl-Lynn 

3 years of Blogging already!!

I had not realized I started with WordPress 3 years already!  I first started with Alecoute-Ntouch   then graduated to Stop The Stigma   then Cher Shares

Ultimately I started with Ntouch to market my workshops and then I wanted to share my thoughts with chershares.  And finally it was really last year that I seriously put more effort in blogging on Stop the Stigma.

How fortunate it is to have a great community like WordPress. We have technical support for free, a community of creative writers and bloggers but mostly, I have noticed a wealth of caring and devoted people here. So to get this nice WP wish in my notifications tonight was truly a warm fuzzy blanket I could wrap myself in.  Thanks WordPress!

You registered on WordPress.com 3 years ago!

Thanks for flying with us. Keep up the good blogging!

 

My life changed

WIN_20131110_165216

I was a teenager when my sister gave birth to my nephew, my godchild. I never thought my life would be quite the same after his birth. Mom and I were so excited and silly happy (if that is a correct expression). We had always been “girls” at home. We knew nothing about boys. Well, the basic plumbing, I guess but nothing about little baby boys. I had boy cousins. Mostly they were older than me and a few younger but we were too young to pay much attention to how a little baby boy was, how a little boy interacted with the world. They were just cousins, sheesh!

I remember the first time Mom was changing his diaper and I was right next to her…like I said, keep in mind, we did not know much about little baby boys. Well, the air must have triggered his urge to…peeee and squirt right in Mom’s eye…she just laughed…I tell ya, we were just so silly! I loved that kid so darn much and when I became pregnant years later, I was a bit apprehensive. I wondered if it was possible to love a child as much or more than I loved my godchild.

That is when I had this earth shattering discovery…it was possible! My son was born after many years of trying to start a family. We had been trying to conceive a few years after our marriage and when the miracle finally happened, I gave birth to a beautiful, picture perfect, “Gerber look- a- like” baby boy on November 7th.

I remember bringing him home that first day from the hospital, laying him in the middle of our double bed; I undressed him and just stared at him thinking to myself, “Such a little human being depending on us for everything …absolutely everything!” I was scared, overwhelmed and high on adrenalin for having our baby…finally! I planned to be the best I could be and give him the best he deserved. Oh, boy, what a tall order but it was my hope and intention. His father felt the same.

Breastfeeding was no picnic the first few months…but I was determined to give him the best nutrition humanly possible {that human would be me alright…ouch, ouch, ouch!} but that did pass eventually. I wanted to nurse him for 4 months and return to work as we only had 4 months in those days. But he was not quite ready to eat and everything was going so well…that I prolonged it to 8 months and the nursing 18 months! Hey, when things go well, why stop?

The first few months when he would wake up for a feeding, I remember shuffling over to his crib in his bedroom next to ours, thinking to myself, “Boy oh boy, I had been trying for years to have this baby …good thing I reeeeeally planned for this.” It IS tough those first few months. How to read each different cry, moan, whine. Getting used to nursing is not so easy when you have fair skin that can burn easily… But after 2 months it went uphill all the way.   That too did pass.

Our neighbours had two 2 adolescent girls who became babysitters later…they stopped by often after school just to see him…not me much, I don’t think, I don’t think I was that cute!

My life changed completely. I used to have ambitions and goals. As a couple we had dreams too and this first house was a home but also a “wise investment”…maybe later we would get a bigger house. But having this child changed my goals as well as my interests. Material things like a bigger house or bigger car seemed so trivial to me now.

Having a child walk through a field of wild flowers and stop every two seconds to smell them made me see the world differently. Watching him stare at an ant hill as if it was a 3-D movie for 30 to 40 minutes at a time, made me stop too and start looking through his eyes. I was given a second chance to see the world differently.

Fast forward to the teen years and he started playing guitar. Going to sleep at night whilst he practised on his classical guitar with Beethoven as my lullaby. Being exposed to his CD’s of Hendrix and Zeppelin gave me a second chance to savour these classics. Growing up I was into Motown, Beatles and Rolling Stones…that was pretty much my interests…

Having children allows parents to rediscover the world. It allowed me to play again…playing in the sand and making mud pies is fun!
I have to say that my fear of not knowing if I had enough love in me for another child was quickly dispersed…no problem there…the love is rooted inside the core of a human being…and if your child hurts, you hurt, if they are happy, you are happy, when they are giggling with joy, you can’t help but laugh along with them.

Someone once told me that a mother’s love is like a flame on a candle, you can light many many candles from that same flame and the flame will be the same…burning just as much and glowing just as beautifully…so I knew I had as much for our daughter who followed almost 3 years later.

© Cheryl-Lynn,  originally written 3 days after my son’s birthday making this writing exercise quite easy,  November 10, 2013

This is a contribution to a FreeWriteFridays writing prompt on Life Changers.

Precious Friendships

536036_486906314701932_586303520_n

Friendship is a precious gift I so  treasure

many relationships I tenderly embrace

a true friendship withstands the pressure

when you are placed face to face

with differences of opinions and adversity

but I take this as an opportunity

to grow and go with the flow

sometimes I even advocate for diversity.

You see how friendships make me grow?!

Let us not talk of those present in my life..

I’d need a book or two to fill the richness

some angels have brought in my life.

They know who they are…

it’s a heartfelt sense of pure love…

 

And then there are friends who are

just passing through for a little while.

 

Some friends are here for just a season

like delightful school chums and working buddies;

that special friend that shared a desk

a coffee, a muffin in such and such a class.

 

Grace, who shared her deep dark secret

I listened, she cried, I listened some more;

who knew I might be faced with a similar

dilemma a few years down the road!?

 

Oh and that committee friend that made me laugh,

that task force we were sitting on that year.

How she helped me not take things so seriously.

 

My sailing and walking friend by the lake

great times spent for leisure’s sake;

 

But,some friends are here for a reason

and once departed I might see why;

 

Louise who encouraged me to keep

on trying to have a baby…

she knew the agony

the despair of waiting,

she too waited ten years

…my  seven  seems trivial  by far.

 

My dearest neighbour and midnight friend,

Janet, how we shared so much together,

to speak aloud of what we shared

… oh my God!!! we’d never

be able to find this same measure

of  understanding….of such treasured

secrets…shared in strict confidence.

 

She blessed my life with her love of life

her immense patience that  unfortunately

did not rub off enough on me, but still,

it saved me and the kids tumultuous times;

it kept my marriage intact for a few more years

holding on, walking,  talking, burning her ears.

she taught me to relax and play more

enjoy the kids, just play and roll on the floor

and be silly and just BE.

 

And Wayne,  why did he leave so fast?

I still can’t accept he’s gone at last!

he was my boss, my colleague,

my dearest friend.

We shared our woes of so many things

relationships, partners and our children, too.

Oh how he was such an amazing dad!

And what a cook he was …a great chef!

feeding his daughter’s umpteen pals

he was the most  fabulous dad of them all!

And then he left this plane for good.

My only true consolation is that

someday I will meet them all in that

other dimension…up there or around here;

my family awaits too also near. 

We’ll have a bash, a pint of beer!

when my time comes they’ll all be here. 

For friendships past and present too,

I’m blessed, I’m rich, and thank all of you.

© Cheryl-Lynn Roberts,  originally written on November 3, 2013

Dungeon Prompts on Friendship

Give me strength…

Oh dear I done did it! Dear dear me, please give me the strength to get through the next 7 days without him… {A mother’s sigh…not to be confused with just any sigh…anguish, longing and sense of dread…attracting sympathy especially from other mothers and grandmothers BUT may also illicit groans from the cold hearted.}

I had to send him off for a WHOLE WEEK! I miss him already!!! This brought back so many memories.

Do you remember the feeling you had the first time your eldest child had to go to daycare or kindergarten? Oh, boy did I cry and wander around for days wondering how I was going to cope and worried about him. Would he be able to tell someone when he was hungry for a snack? Would someone “get it” when his feelings got hurt because he was so sensitive? How would he manage in public not sucking on his thumb for comfort? I do remember when he got home, how he would curl up on the lazy boy, leaning his head on the arm, slip his left hand up his sleeve to minouche {stroke} his forearm, and stick his thumb from his right hand, while watching an episode of Scooby Doo….awww, total bliss!

At least those were hours of detachment I gradually got accustomed to.But at least I had my youngest child with me to fill my heart and my time whilst he was in the hands of “other” adults. Oh, dear, to relinquish trust like that took time. Building a good rapport with educators helped.

But oh, you would think with the second child Kindergarten would be a snap, no problem. I should have been a pro, right? NO! We both cried every morning, my daughter and me, clutching to each other like crazed females.  It took months to get accustomed to my baby no longer home. Now what was I for 6 hours a day?  What was my role now?  That’s when Mommy became a  student again.

Then came the sleepover, oh dear! Part of me was relieved, “Oh, goodie, time for me and his father to play!” and another part of me would sneak out and dig needles of guilt into my “good mommy heart”. “What was I thinking of having some adult fun when my children were away for an entire night?!”

And then the summer camp came around. It was a bible camp in the Eastern Townships at Lac Massawippi. My eldest was staying away for an entire week!!   Oh, my how that was trying!! A whole week at 7 years old, he was to sleep in a tent! The nights would certainly be chilly and damp!! And what if he had a nightmare or woke up looking for HOME? What if an animal was lurking around and he didn’t hear everyone screaming to run out of the tent? He was such a heavy sleeper, a train could run through his bedroom and he would sleep right through it! Oh, how I remember those first few days when he was at camp. I missed him so much and was so worried; I had to shut the door to his bedroom because just walking by that open door in the hallway and seeing that empty room would make my heart sink.

Parents were not even allowed to phone the camp, so the children did not get homesick. I would phone the cook…that’s right? I would check in with the cook a few times that week to see if my little guy was eating alright. And he was!! That was a good sign, right?!

Well, I did get through those trips and so did he and she.  They never knew about my angst…that was for me to know and to eventually grow out of. I did. He’s a grown man. And my daughter and I went through the similar angst as well…almost carbon copy but different…she had a very different personality…very independent. I think we both struggled with the push and pull of becoming separate.

But now today, I am brought right back to those times and am not sure how I am going to manage …a whole week without…a whole week not communicating!! Oh, dear, how will I manage…it is harder now that I live alone…I mean I don’t have a husband or partner or roommate to share my worries and yearnings of not having him around…

Oh dear {sigh!}

I guess I will have to just suck it up, right?! It has been 3 hours already and I am slowly getting used to the idea …I left without crying though…that’s good, right? I left feeling I will be able to trust these people who will be caring for him all week, right?

I had to come to work after dropping him off, so that will keep my mind busy.

I have no clue how I will be by tomorrow or Tuesday! or Wednesday!! Oh, my, maybe I will try to get into the Hallowe’en mood and focus on fun things children like…adults do too, actually.

Just have to suck it up and be an adult about this…

Yes, I will just have to wait until Staples Office (Bureau en Gros calls me when my dear, loving laptop is ready from a week of diagnostic testing and servicing…{sigh} yes, that’s it…I shall have to rely on my sturdy notebook, my smart phone and the computer at work. I know I can do it!!!

The End, by Cheryl-Lynn Roberts

This was a fun exercise Lilith Colbert, a real goddess in poetry and narratives has prompted on Wednesday Short Story Prompt #26 – In Wolf’s Clothing at WDBWP (We Drink Because We’re Poets)

Our challenge this week was to concoct a tale that’s more than meets the eye – a Transformer of shorts, a mind-boggling of epic proportions. What a great occasion to mess with the minds of our readers! I hope my readers enjoyed this fun story. I had a blast writing it.  I was composing it in the car in my head on my drive to work after I dropped off my laptop at Staples.

 

© Cheryl-Lynn Roberts,  originally written on October 27, 2013  on my blog httpp://stigmahurtseveryone.wordpress.com

 

Photo credits:  Lonely Evening – Woman Thinking About Problems .  Waiting Of Night …  www.123rf.com

What is PEACE?

 

Simple Sunday with Artist Delawer Omar     http://www.friendburst.com

What is peace
but an attitude
that will release
any inquietude;
it’s worry free
battle free
bully free
racist free
bigot free,
colour blind,
faithfully liberal
remarkably kind,
spiritually lenient
exceptionally charitable
massively tolerant
conflict free
purely carefree.

Childlike mentality
innocent, trusting,
seeking hospitality
lucent thinking.
Peace is never ever
second guessing
there’d be clever
deeds ever deceitful;
when there’s peace
all acts are truthful;
all is authentic
genuine, real.
like the Velveteen Rabbit
who became at peace
once he became real.
Peace is harmony
relating in accord
never feeling discord
what a lovely place
to be
when making peace
an essential
fundamental base
to perpetuate
to nurture
to promulgate
in one’s future.
Peace is love
love is peace
becoming one.
You,
I,
we…
are one,
living in peace.

© Cheryl-Lynn – originally written October 26, 2013

Dungeon Prompts – Week 11: Peace – Just a Word? What does it mean to you?

Micropoetry ~ Waka ~ Flash Fiction

%d bloggers like this: