Getting her living room ready for a long overdue visit felt good. She mops the floor of dust and chat hairs; it is still quite hot outside at 28C, so she keeps the windows closed and AC on. Looking at her watch she decides to relax a bit before her visit but not before adding a touch of lipstick and then the chimes of her phone announce her virtual visit.
How her heart fills with joy chatting, laughing and just enjoying the visit with a person she met almost twenty years ago. After a long pleasant chat, she checks the air on her balcony and sighs with relief…finally turns the AC off and enjoys the quiet with the windows open, smelling the scent of new life.
Tree branches stretch
Belated foliage unfolds
soft breeze brings solace
I remember as a first time mom how much I questioned so much about the health and safety of our son. His first fall, I held him in my arms and cried with him…and cried some more even after he had stopped, whispering over and over, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry”.
Parents in general are very proud of their children and some also like to boast…”Oh, he said his first word at “blank”…or “Oh, your son still doesn’t have teeth? Mine has five already.” Most times, you try to shrug it off but once you get home you take out Dr. Spock or any other paediatric bible you have for reassurance.
I remember our paediatrician, who was a teacher at McGill and the Head of paediatrics at the Jewish General Hospital would take phone calls from worried moms every morning from 7:30 am to 8:00am. What a godsend! Once he replied to my question that our son’s teeth would be stronger if they come in later. Hmm, well, that reassured me. I tried not to boast too much except with my mom, of course. As a nana though I don’t hold back…grandparents have brag rights…it is WRITTEN…somewhere…:)
Today, it is May 15th and the lawns and landscapes are still quite bare. At least it is not snowing but it would be so nice to start having some greenery on those trees. I am not even asking for flowers…just leaves! But I must have patience and embrace the tiny signs of growth…
limbs in wait
blossoms spreading slowly
late bloomers growing stronger
bringing hope to the world
Il semble approprié de placer mon beau bouquet de fleurs que mon fils et ma belle fille m’ont donné pour la fête des mères dans ma chambre juste à côté de la chaise de ma mère.Ce soir, je vais m’asseoir tranquillement en me bercant sur sa chaise et sentir sa présence.
se souvenir ce rire contagieux parfum de Givenchy pincement passionné des joues chuchoter, “Je t’aime ma chérie”
It seems fitting to place my beautiful bouquet of flowers my son and daughter gave me for Mother’s Day in my room right next to my mom’s chair. Tonight, I will sit quietly rocking in her chair feeling her presence.
that infectious laugh
scent of Givenchy
passionately pinching cheeks
whispering, “Love you darling”
After two days of cleaning and washing she decides to go out for a walk. It was so warm all she needed was a light pullover. She filled her pockets with necessities: tissue, mask in a Ziploc bag, latex gloves, her health card and something she has never done before…she wrote up an Emergency card with her Allergy, contacts of her doctor, pharmacy, her two children on a business card. Now she felt better and put her keys around her neck and her mala beads.
She likes her street because everyone is respectful of social distancing. Not everyone smiles and answers her greeting, but that’s okay. When she turned onto another street she almost bumped into two young children on their bikes. One snickered and thought it was funny that they pretended to run into her. The first one made her chuckle thinking it was all innocent but she was disappointed that the parents did not even acknowledge her greeting or tell their child to be more careful. After the second child darted at her, she decided to walk very far from any future children on bikes. Maybe they see her as one of the main reasons for this lockdown. The media and politicians keep saying how this lockdown is to keep older people alive and she wonders if this is starting to feel like too much of a sacrifice for many. It is sad that people do not look at updates for there are many people between 25 to 45 that are testing positive and deaths are not high among this group but any death is too much, right?
She starts chanting her mantra silently and walking for about twenty minutes and then decides to change the Jazz on her phone to R & B. Suddenly her step matches the beat and each song she adds is just a bit faster. She is just soaking up music of Ben E. King, Daft Punk, The Four Tops and Santana… and after almost 4 K, then she chooses a slower beat to cool down and walks around the block twice before getting back into her condo.
Music picks her up
Feels her heart fly
High on endorphins
Clouds form shapes
Etched on blue canvas
Divine Artist paints
Smiling and laughing
From a safe distance
Defying the enemy
Pure bliss wins
Ending her day with a video call warms her heart and she knows she will have a good night’s sleep tonight.
Connecting with loved ones
virtual home visits
During her lunch break she wanted to go out for a walk but there were too many people walking the street. Some two by two, a teen on roller blades and cyclist in shorts. Resigning to taking the garbage out, she felt she might soak up the sun for a few minutes. When she walked out her heart skipped a beat…”No, don’t close the gate yet, I need to bring mine”…standing at 5 metres from them she felt her heart swell…
showing its warmth
forced her out
a brief moment
showing its warmth
two ladies by the dumpster
halos circle their heads
smiling at me
She is not alone. That is what the isolation makes you feel as if you are alone feeling what feel. The women both nodded that they had good days and bad days. Yes!! It was such a relief to speak to live women close to her age …we share the love for our offspring, the worry, the longing. And even though it is a sad reality, she walked back to her unit with a lighter foot.
speaking to live humans in person
So many people were out; some looked content others look serious and walked with purpose. A few only exposed their eyes.
It appeared chilly since many were still wearing wool tuques and scarves. At least in our winters and spring here we can lift a scarf over our mouth and nose without it looking out of place…too much. She is debating whether she should go out or not. She looks from her balcony wringing her dry hands like an old scared woman.
Strangers on her street
Face masks, the new spring fashion
peeks from her window
trying to catch up
youngster pedals with a purpose
father in slow motion
exhaustion showers over her
Last day of my three day work week and not too soon. Struggling to sleep at night when the rest of the building seems to sleep late…a neighbour that walks with heavy feet anytime from midnight to three in the morning makes for a short night. I am sure she does not realize this and since I am a new owner here, I have not had a chance to meet anyone except for the owner downstairs, who I have told to bang on the ceiling anytime if I am too noisy or the music or tele is too loud.
I am such a light sleeper so even if I go to bed at 8 or 9 which I did last night, I woke up with a start at midnight and struggled to get back to sleep hours later. Ear plugs do not seem to muffle the vibration of a person banging a closet door or plodding . I’ve chosen to sleep with my earbuds listening to music with the volume low and yet…
floating on an astral plane
rumbling clouds shudder
from the third floor
Snow greeted me this morning on my patio as a mid-spring scenery.
snow on our lawns
so much for Mother Earth
giving us the finger
I took a nice bubble bath before my shift and watched a few short videos celebrating Earth Day.
The morning was not too bad but during lunch, I couldn’t help but check on the news to hear updates and that can get me nervous and frustrated. Lately, I notice a bubbling impatience inside my chest. Our province is still rising…over half of the country’s stats. How can you ever get used to hearing about deaths? Two friends told me this week they lost a relative…reality sucks! Whether it is 1 or 100 (which is nothing compared to Europe, I know and I can only imagine how scary it must be too…but still a life multiplied by xxxx is always too much.
My calls were more frenzied in the afternoon and it took a lot for me to concentrate…trying to ignore the simmering storm.
sadness and angst
listening to their suffering
licking salty lips