Dreams (troiku)

Dreams like water-colored paintings 
Wash away when days are raining © Cubby at Reowr 
 
 
vibrant colours bleed 
spilling on green blades 
sinking in the soil 
 
vibrant colours bleed 
echoing cries and screams 
disappearing fears 
 
spilling on green blades 
red and green and silvery tints 
like dressing up a tree 
 
sinking in the soil 
scary images traced with joy 
making worms go wild 
 
© Tournesol ‘ 19/01/06 
 
We are asked to complete the first two lines from Cubby’s poem.
I have completed it with a troiku which is a new form of haiku created 
by Chevrefeuille at Carpe Diem Haiku Kai. 
It is also one of my favourite forms. 

Prompt: Reowr – Dreams
 
 

back to work (free verse)

Painting by Mae Giroux, Oakville, On. (my dear aunt)

 
she must get to sleep! 
in less than an hour 
bloody birds will peep 
chirping away with joy 
waiting for a new dawn 
but, 
for an insomniac 
their fervor makes  her yawn 
sometimes make her go mad! 
 
still 
she must sleep 
in four hours the alarm will buzz 
grating at her every pore 
beep beep beep beep beep 
annoying bleeping clock! 
 
today she returns to work 
a five day break she took 
away from tears 
away from pain 
away from fears 
abusive grownups 
hurting them in vain 
controlling 
and narcissistic 
crushing their spirits 
killing all their hopes 
sometimes they want to die 
it seems 
their only way  
out of such misery... 
 
unless 
 
they, I, together 
we choose  
another plan 
they’ll live on one condition 
those grownup bleepers  
will be reported 
 
the cops will come 
and bring their troops 
youth workers and the like 
 
 
and yet, 
 
more time will run its course 
over days and weeks and months 
until this youth is safe 
from physical, 
sexual 
and emotional wrath 
 
but n’er from her bad dreams 
and not from all her wounds 
no, indeed that takes 
an entire lifetime 
she’ll start the healing process 
a little bit here and there 
a break for a while 
trying to ignore the pain 
reprieve from all those memories 
 
and on and on it goes 
the victim pays a lifetime 
assailant n’er long enough 
 
who said life’s even fair? 
the wounded try to mend 
their broken and bruised souls 
abusers lick their wounds 
playing victim of their sins 
who said life’s even fair?

...one last yawn,
reciting her 3 Hail Mary's
an Act of Contrition
and prays for a better day.
(c) Cheryl-Lynn '19/01/06

Road trips (troiku – daily moments Jan 5, 2019)

(c) OliGagnon 2003
Remembering long ago short family road trips. They had little to say after so many years. The hum of the motor slowly put the children in the back seat to sleep and she was left with her thoughts. She would make up movies in her head where she was another person, vibrant and confidant.

remembering 
family drives 
country roads 
 
remembering 
searching 
from her  window 
 
family drives
muted journeys
movies in her head 
 
country roads 
fields of wild flowers 
endless possibilities 
 
 
© Tournesol ‘19/01/05 
 
Daily Moments January 5 2019  Road Trips 
 
 
 

Remembering (troibun) Daily Moments Jan 5/19

It’s 1950 something…

She was always a daydreamer ever since a young child. As she grew up she would change the endings of movies she had seen and create different scenarios. Life is like that! Movies hold only one script of a possibility.

Imagine if fathers would clean the house, cook the meals, do the laundry, shop at the grocery store, bring the children to the doctor and tuck them in! Mothers would come home after a long day at work greeted by their husband holding a chilled glass of white wine or maybe a cup of tea.

Imagine if fathers walked the children to school and talked to the teacher when they had belly aches or that boy kept pulling her hair! Imagine if fathers sat patiently at the kitchen table helping children learn their ABC’s!

Such a silly dream she had in the 1950’s but it would have been a nice change to see.

 
tripping 
falling down the stairs 
who kissed the boo boo? 
 
tripping 
Daddy catches her 
before she falls 
 
falling down the stairs 
someone pushed her 
heart aches more than flesh
 
who kissed the boo boo 
waking up to reality 
mothers know best

© Tournesol ‘19/01/05 
Daily Moments January 5 2019   Remembering  Troibun

That damn wall again (troiku)

There comes a time
helpers of lost souls
hitting a wall

there comes a time
universe sends a warning
to slow down

helpers of lost souls
sometimes lose direction
maze of great pain

hitting a wall
forcing one to stop
practicing self-care

(c) Tournesol 19/01/02

Daily Moments – That damn wall again – Troiku January 2, 2019

catch-up not ketchup (troibun)

2018 started with residues of 2017 months to heal the soul by the ocean in California and the soul slowly mended. Yet, the body takes so much longer to heal.  This was a year of change, negotiating her first collective agreement…something she never thought she would ever take part in but thinking of her peers, she wanted to give as much as she could to these angels who make a difference in the lives of  youths and heroes of the night. 

Positive change is on the rise comingled with a tsunami of service demands.  Let’s try to focus on the positive changes and see how they can manage the flood of demands a wee bit better.

The summer was blessed with a trip to Mexico celebrating the promise of forever love between her son and his new bride. A beach wedding and dining by the ocean at sunset.  How can one not embrace life and love!?

Here we are the last day of 2018 and she still feels like she is playing catch-up.  2018, a year of shedding tears, not enough to fill an ocean but certainly enough to fill a lake, a river or pond. She wonders how fresh water fish could thrive in salt water. 

Today, she listens to their pain for the last time this year. She feels her joints screaming blue murder.  Is it possible to have sympathy pains in your body for the emotional suffering of others?  The more the hours move forward, she feels her body get heavier and heavier (no wait, that might be the chocolates and mid-afternoon pastries!).   Ah, yes, comfort food…soothing taste buds feeling like that nice cookie and milk mama gave after she had fallen and she had kissed her boo boo.

embracing moments
wedding vows by the ocean
barefoot on the beach

embracing moments
rolling with the waves
salt water floater

wedding vows by the ocean
even spirits are moved
Mom’s picture fell

barefoot on the beach
playful and delightful
celebrating love

©Tournesol ‘18/12/31

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

waiting for countdown (troiku – senryu)

knitting
weaving thoughts 
melancholy wool

knitting
dropping that last stitch
New Year’s Eve

weaving thoughts 
balancing hands and loom
in tandem

melancholy wool
patching wounds
forgiveness heals

© Tournesol ‘18/12/31

tic toc tic toc
waiting
countdown to midnight

(c) Tournesol’18-12-31

Baby it’s cold outside

This is the time of year she hears pros and cons (mostly cons) of Baby It’s Cold Outside, so she decided to watch the video once more. The message she remembers getting from this since she was a young child was “DON’T TRUST MEN!” She learned that if you go home for a nightcap at a man’s home or hotel room or whatever room he borrowed for a night was, do NOT trust him. You must keep your drink of soda in your hand ALWAYS even if you have to go to the washroom…like her mom always said, “Keep your drink within your sights at ALL time because your drink could be spiked with drugs.”

Isn’t that intersesting that in the 1960’s her mom was warning her about getting raped but we did not say that word in those days. When an older man, creepy drunk uncle, granddad or dad was too touchy feely, you were told to just squirm away politely. Yep, none of this was discussed openly. Why not? Why did we not just call things as they were? A lot of girls and young women may have skirted sexual assault, incest and RAPE. You know that 4-letter word that describes NO CONSENT!

Yeah, this really irks her thinking back how things were swept under the rug.

She remembers in the late 90’, newly single in her 40’s. She did not know much about dating. What does one know about dating when one is engaged at 16? She remembers going to a dance club with her girlfriends and at 02:45 (15 mins before closing time) the vultures checking their prey from the mezzanine would come down to pick a gift to take home…or hope to take home. A freebie, no doubt since they were too cheap to even buy a lady a drink. The music got louder the last hour before closing and the beat sounded like jungle music. Really!! And that is when she started smoking again so she could sit at the bar and give an excuse she had to finish her cigarette to NOT accept to dance with any of the losers fellas there. She liked dancing with her girl friends but when men tried to join them, she felt it an intrusion of their free spirited fun. It was sad to see how some people (men and women) hoped to meet the person of their dreams at a meat market dance club.

What is that about? Looking to score with a drunk woman was their goal. How pathetic is that? The remorse the next morning and that was not guilty feelings from the hunter but the prey turned victim turned guilt ridden blaming herself that she should not have dressed like that, should not have drunk so much, should not have gone out to that dance club…period!

And so she watches the video a third time in one sitting and tears run down her cheek as a memory of something- something flashes by her eyes…a memory she had buried so far away, she never had time to process. And now the song Baby It’s Cold Outside plays for a third time and she mourns her innocence of long ago, she grieves her loss of makebelieve where peole do not take advantage of other people. She mourns the thought that doctors, priests, dentists, ministers, teachers and other professionals are to be trusted, that fathers all over the world only love and respect their daughters, that dirty old men are only those dressed in dirty ragged clothes.

Now that song takes on a whole new meaning. The song makes her sad, then angry and she is disgruntled on her way to work and impatient with people sitting too close to her on the bus and she mourns her innocence because innocence used to be oh, so bliss.

big eyes
gazing admiringly
when she was six

big eyes
laughing with GrandPapa
watching her hero

gazing admiringly
resilience and honour
GrandMaman

when she was six
heros began to fall
GrandPapa died

© Tournesol ‘ 18 /12/21

Image result for big eyes by margaret keane
(c) Margaret Keane

I love this artist that I discovered in the movie made for her and walking along the rainy streets of San Francisco two years agoshe found her gallery. It was like a child walking into a candy store.

 

holiday dreams (troiku) RonavanWrites Haiku – slow-burn

(c) Clr ’18

 
Hot mug of cocoa 
Sitting before a crackling fire 
Eyelids slowly close 
 
Hot mug of cocoa 
Memories of long ago 
Scents of childhood 
 
Sitting before a crackling fire 
Birch logs burning ever slowly 
Embers glow 
 
Eyelids slowly close 
Dreaming of ol’ saint Nic 
Sleigh bells tin-a-ling  
 
© Tournesol ‘18/12/19 
 
A Troku is a new form of haiku created by Chévrefeuille at Carpe Dieme Haiku Kai  
This is written for RonovanWrites Weekly Haiku: Slow & Burn